Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I need a beard to bite.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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