Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
