Already got asked if we're dating
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
