why didn't you poke me back
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
