That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
