i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
