You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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