She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm bleeding and have questions
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
