wakey wakey hands off snakey
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
