There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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