It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
