so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
