We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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