i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Princesses don't give blow jobs
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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