i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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