So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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