Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
