What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
