I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
