just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I would fuck him just for his dog
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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