my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
It's blow job season.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
