This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
