google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
