Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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