Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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