this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
