Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
