if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
