My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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