Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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