hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
