that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
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