We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
