Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
