wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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