It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
did you just send me my own nude
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
