fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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