i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
