so that wasnt chicken after all
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
