3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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