Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Randomize
