White coat. Heels.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Randomize
