5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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