I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
