Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
