Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Randomize
