I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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