goodnight i made you a song goodbye
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
