I understand Curling. That high.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
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