what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
My penis needs a shock collar
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
